Well, I have had time to digest all that went down during my 14 days in the dark, and now it is time to try and share as much of it as possible! Many thanks to my boyfriend Kevin for taking care of me for that long, I literally couldn’t have done this without him.
I spent the first four days sleeping – a lot. It was a weird feeling of losing all personal responsibility except for taking showers and brushing my teeth. Actually, even those two simple tasks seemed very hard. I would spend an hour just thinking about how I should be getting up to brush my teeth!
Something like what I saw, minus the words.
On the fifth day I had my first altered reality experience. It was very short. I was lying in my bed and a theater screen was in front of me. It was showing a pixelated tapestry, blue yellow and green (something like the image to the left from Nicholas Pike). I could hear Enya-type music, which was fun. There was a high-frequency sound in my ears as well. The images would get brighter and clearer when the frequency became louder. Unfortunately, the vision was so real that I started freaking out because I thought that the light from the screen would ruin the darkness I was supposed to be in, so I reached over to put my blinders on and the vision stopped. I felt very, very dumb for the next few minutes!
After the fifth day I started seeing lights about half of the time. Mostly they would be in the corners of my eyes, but occasionally one would move closer to the center of my vision. One time I woke up and there was a really intense ball of light that looked like the sun right in the middle of my vision. The flickering light was comforting and beautiful.
Also, after the fifth day I started to be able to “see” in the dark. It was really freaky to go into the restroom with my blindfold on and still be able to see my dark shadow in the mirror. I suppose that the whole “third eye” thing is true, as I was definitely not using my normal two eyes!
Towards the ninth day I began to really hallucinate. That was when things got a bit creepy. On the left side of my vision the lighting was red, and I had to watch, over and over again, bodies having sex. Ok you might think that is cool, but after several hours it gets old. Not to mention the fact that on the right hand side of my vision, the lighting was a cold blue and there was a dark figure continually crouching next to me! Whenever I would move or get up to use the restroom, both hallucinations would stop what they were doing and imitate my exact movements. The part that freaked me out the most was one time as I was walking into the bathroom two figures had already anticipated my move to sit down on the toilet and they were imitating me in the shower. Keep in mind, these things didn’t go away if I “closed” my eyes! I had to eventually get used to them and not get freaked out.
The hallucinations weren’t all bad, however. On day 10 I woke up from a dream to see a golden angel statue in front of me, holding what I think was a ruby by her heart but who knows. She had these really cool wings that curved upwards and almost made a circle, I couldn’t tell what they were made of but they sure weren’t feathers. I remembered this image and wanted to look it up online when I got out. I spent the last two weeks searching for this angel on google, to no avail. Then finally just a few days ago I accidentally stumbled across her. Meet Avalokiteshvara, the Buddha of compassion.
Avalokiteshvara, the buddha of compassion
Avalokitesvara was a bodhisattva (male or female, depending on the story) who took a vow to assist all beings to achieve nirvana before allowing himself to attain enlightenment. When I learned of this, my heart leapt. For me, it is a sure sign that I am on my path and that I am being guided in some way. But wait, there’s more: Avalokitesvara’s mantra that she teaches is “OM Mani Padme Hung”, meaning something like “The Jewel Is In The Lotus!” In Sanskrit, he is also referred to as Padmapani, which means “Holder of the Lotus”.
Need I remind you that the friggin poster for my film is of a human rising out of a lotus flower. !!!
Avalokiteshvara is known to hold a cintamini, a wish-fufilling jewel. I think that is the ruby that I saw she was holding! In Japan, the same deity was known as Kwanon, which is where the camera brand “Canon” comes from. I am shooting this film with a Canon…
Guanyin (Avalokiteshvara) holding a red jewel?
I also had the most meaningful dream of my life during my time in the dark. I won’t relate the entire dream, as it was very personal, but at the very end I was told to count to three and say the word “Love” and then the first word that came to my mind. As I counted to three, I woke myself up by saying “Love yourself.” That may be all the enlightenment I need right now!
Morning Glory
So yeah, I am pretty happy with what went on in the dark. There are probably a few too many things that happened to tell you about in great detail right now, but one of the last ones before I got out was seeing an indigo blue flower with a pink center (almost exactly like the Morning Glory flower pictured above). It was in the middle of my forehead and I took it to be a good omen, much like the omens in Paul Coelho’s The Alchemist, which I am reading right now. I love this quote from it: “When you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it”. I’m still trying to reach enlightenment, but I think I’m one step closer.
When I got out of the dark, I may not have been enlightened, but the experience of seeing another human being’s face – in particular, Kevin’s – was breathtaking. And the sky was so blue, and the plants were so green, it was awesome.
If you have any specific questions about my experiences in the dark, just comment and I’ll be sure to reply!
I’m glad it was successful experience for you!! It’s fascinating what you’ve described and obviously it was very uniquely for you and about you! Thank you for sharing your experiences.
Nils,
What a wonderful experience. Spiritual Growth takes so many varied and magnificent forms. What a gentle way to experience!
Do you plan to make a film about your experience? I think it would be fascinating to viewers, in any form. The description above certainly is.
Bailey, I will certainly include my time in the dark in the documentary! I have audio recordings of me and an excellent interview with someone who came to visit me.
I could mention all the details i found interesting, but to keep the long story short, i found it all very intriguing and cool. Satisfied my curiosity, for sure. One thing i’m still curious about, though: i realize you don’t feel you’ve achieved enlightenment, though you feel you’ve come closer to it; besides the short term physical effects (like a sensory overload and a newfound appreciation of colors we usually take for granted), do you feel any change in personality that you think will stick with you for some time?
Thanks for posting this btw -
Thanks for the comment! The real change I feel is from the dream I had about loving myself. It is a problem I have struggled with all my life, in standing up for myself and learning how to be selfish in a good way. In other words, from now on I don’t think I will be allowing someone else to take advantage of me or spend all my energy on someone else and not have any left for me. I have lost a lot of the guilt I had about that. I am learning to love myself first, and through that love I can love everything.
Hay Kevin!
Awesome to read what transpired for you! I also underwent my own DIY DR-enlightenment retreat of sorts.. it was similar. i had Kundalini, frontal lobes openings to bliss impossible to describe and stuff like that… (my Blog post about it: http://tinyurl.com/bslxp6v) – By the way, in 2 months I’ll do my first Ibogaine experience and man.. you and I should connect ! We’re on the same path here :)
Take Care
NiRo
www.SoundWaveMeditation.com
I loved reading your blog, and I would like to hear more about your Kundalini experience! I have never heard of Ibogaine but I looked it up and that sounds very interesting. I friended you on Facebook, I’m Nils btw… Kevin is my fiance. Oh and you live in Croatia!? That is my number one place I would love to visit one day!
WHere did you do this?
In my bedroom!
The sensitivity of the dark-adapted human eye is greatest at about 507 nm, a bluish-green color, while the light-adapted eye is most sensitive about 555 nm, a yellowish-green color.
hi
i’m Daniel
just thought i’d drop you a line to say hi
i also sat in the dark at about the same time that you did; i also used my bedroom to do it
the thing i wanted to ask you is, what made you do this in the first place?
the reason i ask is, the idea to sit in the dark came to me out of no where. i just felt a strong urge to do it. i knew a bit about Mantak Chia and at the time this was the only information i could find… but now i look online and it seems there were quite a few others that decided to sit in the dark at around the same time that you and i did and this is interesting to me… so i thought id write and try to connect and see what comes of it
i have been an explorer of the astral realms for many years but this was by far the most profound and life-changing experience i have had. i’m keen to repeat the experience and also to let others know about it as it seems that there are many people who want to have this kind of “meet your maker” astral level experience but do not want to ingest drugs or be involved in illegal activities
so anyway, just thought i’d write to you and see what comes of it
may i ask what country you are in? i’m in Australia
hope to hear from you
Love and truth,
D.
Hi Daniel, thanks for saying hi! I’m in Florida in the US. That is really really cool that it sounds like others were sitting in the dark around the same time as you and me. I chose to do it after reading about darkroom experiences in Geoff Stray’s book “2012: Catastrophe or Awakening?”. I had not been much of an explorer of the astral realms beforehand, but the experience definitely did change my life. I was also interested to read in a book on Lemuria called “Lemurian Scrolls – Angelic Prophecies Revealing Human Origins” that the Lemurians used to spend much of their time underground in darkness, and believe that one day we will return to that way of living. I would also like to spend more time in the dark, but next time with other people!